7.14 Escape by TW and ED (Part VIII)

as retold by RepairmanBob
ED: “There is no time! You must do what is necessary, Kal-El! Save your world from Darkseid!”
JG: Darkseid starts to fly. “You have the conceit to anger the Lord of Apokolipis! You, who are but a mote of dust before my greatness, would have the gall to draw my attention!”
TW: Clark looks at Zod.
ED: “Go, boy! “
JG: Darkseid speeds up, moving towards Clark. His voice carries across the city. “Your suffering will be as endless as my wrath, Son of Jor-El!”
TW: Clark flies off towards the portal.
JG: Darkseid uses the Omega Effect.
ED: Behind Darkseid, Zod slowly rises.
JG: We show the black rays flying at Clark, as Clark flies towards the portal.
ED: Just before the rays reach Clark, Zod leaps into the air and stabs him through the chest with the crystal knife he used against Ursa and Non.
JG: Darkseid staggers, and the black rays disappear. He looks surprised.
TW: Clark looks around, sees Darkseid and Zod, then spots an object on the ground.
JG: Darkseid slowly drops to the ground, landing on one knee.
TW: Clark appears back at the portal. “Darkseid!”
JG: Darkseid looks up – he is angry. “Kal. El.”
KK: Did Clark just make Darkseid his bitch?
TW: “Kneel before me.” Zoom in close on Clark’s hand – he is holding the dead man’s switch.
ED: Zod starts to laugh.
MR: Seems like more of a Clark / Zod team effort.
JG: Poor Darkseid just got tag teamed into bitchdom.
KK: Clark... just make Darkseid his bitch. No, that does not sound right.
TW: Clark releases the switch and flies through the portal.
JG: “NOOO!” Darkseid tries to fly towards the switch, but Zod grabs him from behind –
KK: Hehehehe.
ED: Fine, grabs him be the back of the neck and crashes into the portal machine.
TW: Zoom in one of the mini-nukes. A red light starts to flash.
JG: Darkseid is beyond pissed. He shouts and struggles with Zod, who is laughing like the Joker on a sugar rush. Pull back to the machine, the city, and the open plains surrounding them. One mushroom cloud. Then another, then countless more. Zod does believe in overkill.
MR: If you used a few less explosions, we could afford Bowie.

ED: The Earth side of the portal. Hassad is calmly watching his forces, when Clark comes out of the portal. They meet eyes for a second, as Clark takes in the battlefield. “Kal-El! You should be dead!”
TW: Clark smiles, and flies above the portal. He pulls out the crystal.
ED: “No! Stop him! Kill Kal-El! Kill him before the destroys the portal!”
TW: Clark flies, dodging several GreenK blasts from the dog soldiers.
ED: Cut back to Lois, who is taking pictures of the portal. She says “What the hell?” and zooms in closer. She takes pictures of a blurry red figure dodging weapon fire.
TW: Clark flies in close, and jams the crystal into the top of the portal.
ED: Hassad runs away, and the portal begins to glow. The hum of the portal becomes higher pitched and louder. The frame starts to shake, and the glow increases, lighting up the entire battlefield. Finally, it explodes sending out a shock wave in every direction. A red fireball swallows up everything around the portal - which happens to be where the heaviest concentration of the parademons are located. The entire time, Lois is taking pictures.
JG: Zod certainly did know how to make an exit.
MR: And make Clark his bitch
AoT: I am going to miss him.
KK: Hey, do you think Clark could stay on Apokolips and Zod could go through the portal and save Earth?
TW: No!
JG: I like it! Lionel and Zod could be wacky, mismatched roommates!
AoT: And they could bicker over Martha –
JG: -while they plot to take over the world!
TW: No!
MR: Zod and Lex could go clubbing in Metropolis!
ED: Lois could get him an Op-Ed column at the Daily Planet! You Damn Dirty Apes – an outsider’s view of modern Metropolis!
TW: No!
KK: (To the tune of "Pinky and the Brain”) They’re MB and the Zod, MB and the Zod.
JG: They’re both super villains
ED: And neither likes cod.
MR: Clark’s dumb ass they’re fought
AoT: But they think his mom is hot!
ED+JG+KK+MR+AoT: They’re MB, they’re MB and the Zod, Zod, Zod, Zod, Zod!
KK: So we are agreed then?
TW: We are not killing Clark off!
KK: (Mocking voice) But Tom, think of the good of the show.
TW: Screw you and your shorter but still shiny hair, Keurk!
JG: Can we go back to Zod for a second?
AoT: I think Martha would be very interested in helping Zod adapt to Life on earth. Look at the wonderful job she did with Clark.
KK+MR+JG: (Hysterical laughter)
AoT: What?
ED: Yeah, I think –
TW: Focus, Erica! Stay on task! Clark flies through the fireball, and looks down at what is left of the fighting. Show scenes of the army, Justice League and the meta-humans taking out the remaining aliens.
KK: And do we get a big celebration party?
ED: That would be cool!
KK: If you are seven.
JG: If Lionel gets to kiss Martha, I vote for the party.
AoT: I want the party!
TW: We will show people looking relived.
JG: No kiss?
ED: They can hug.
TW: No hugs!
ED: Would you rather they kiss?
TW: Fine, fine.

TW: Lucius best is walking around the battlefield, checking bodies. He is talking to someone on his Bluetooth ear-piece.
JG: Product placement number… oh, fuck it.
MR: You know, if you added a few a few more placement shots, we might not even need to cut anything to afford -
TW: (Snarls)
MR: Just saying.
TW: “Yes, I agree, Titan. We have found seven attempts by those damn LuthorCorp abominations to take our wounded or dead… Well, the military and Green Arrow’s people have been able to stop them. Luthor does not want to risk a confrontation here.”
MR: Since when does Lex not want to risk a confrontation?
KK: Since the revelation that he is stealing dead bodies might impact LuthorCorp’s stock price?
ED: Ohh, maybe Lois should write that?
TW: Write it into another episode. We have a scene to finish. Lucius walks towards the ruins of a building. “I know you think this was pointless, but if the invaders had been successful, they would have killed us as quickly as they killed the humans… The losses were regrettable, but – I will need to call you back.” Lucius looks inside, and sees someone moving. “Hello? Are you hurt?”
ED: The figure turns. It is Hassad, holding an Apokolips gun. “I am terribly sorry, but things have not worked out as I planned and I need to be leaving. That will be harder if anyone knows I am alive.” He smiles and points the gun at Lucius. “Wrong place, wrong time, my friend.”
TW: Lucius smirks. “Are you certain you are not going off half-cocked, Mr. Hassad?”
KK: Even Lucius is getting in on the HoYah?
AoT: He was interest in Martha!
TW: Not every man wants to bang Martha!
AoT: They do if they are straight. Speaking of which, when do I have another scene with the President?
TW: (Covers ears) Lalalalalalala
ED: Hassad smiles confidently. “Excuse me? I never do anything by half measures.”
JG: Have you two ever heard of subtlety? Innuendo? Implied meaning?
TW: On Smallville?
TW+ED+MR+KK+AoT+JG: (Hysterical laughter)

continued...