Prelude to Masquerade (Part I)

[SV break room. KK concentrates in front of her laptop. ED enters.]
ED: Hey, Kristen! [She dumps a coffee cup in the sink] Are you working on the episode?
KK: Yes.
ED: Can I...?
KK: [Interrupting] No.
ED: Does...?
KK: [Interrupting] No.
ED: Will you...?
KK: [Interrupting] No.
ED: [Huffs]
KK: [Finally looks up. Evilly] Did you have something to say?
ED: Um... No?
KK: [Smiles and returns her attention to the laptop] I didn't think so. Now go away.
ED: Yes, of course.
[ED exits. A few seconds later AoT comes in with a pie]
AoT: Kristen I brought you a...
KK: [Takes a sip of coffee. Without looking up] I don't like pie.
AoT: But it's...
KK: [Interrupting] Tom is the one who likes pie.
AoT: And I...
KK: [Interrupting] I don't want it. Take it away.
AoT: [Pauses and moves to look at the screen] Is Martha...?
KK: [Partially closes the laptop] I said take it away. And you with it.
AoT: But...
KK: [Glares]
AoT: Going. [AoT passes JG as she exits] Good luck.
JG: Kristen, my your hair is shinny today!
KK: [Closes her laptop completely and smiles.] It must be the Neutrogena.
JG: Or it could be your natural beauty.
KK: That's always a possibility.
[Awkward pause]
JG: Kristen, I...
KK: You what John?
JG: I was wondering about your script.
KK: You know how it works. If I tell you I have to tell everyone.
JG: You know me. I can keep a secret.
KK: Really?
JG: Absolutely!
KK: So if I knew where Michael was hiding you wouldn't tell Annette, Tom, or Erica?
JG: [Makes the Boy Scout sign] Scout's honor.
KK: [Looks at JG skeptically] I didn't know you were a scout.
JG: I wasn't. But I've played one on TV. Look, Kristen, it's me. I'm trust worthy!
KK: OK. [Whispers into JG's ear. JG smiles widely] I knew it! [Runs off]
[TW enters and gets a cup of coffee]
TW: Hi, Kristen.
KK: [Opens her laptop and starts typing] Hi, Tom.
TW: You do know there's poison ivy in the field you just sent John, Erica, and Annette into?
KK: [false innocence] Is there?
TW: Michael isn't really hiding there, is he?
KK: Why don't you go check it out yourself?
TW: Yeah, right. [Trying to steal a glance at her screen] You wouldn't be working on...
KK: [closes her laptop]...my script?
TW: I thought Michael was supposed to be your co-author? So where is he, really?
KK: Hiding from you, most likely.
TW: You know, I could be your co-author. I have a few really good ideas if I do say so myself.
KK: [Putting up her laptop in her bag] Clark not wearing the suit, for instance?
TW: That and... you're not putting Clark in the suit are you?
KK: [Standing]I'm not getting any work done here. I'm going to my trailer.
TW: Kristen, the suit?
KK: [dramatic sigh] It seems I can't get five minutes peace without being hounded.
TW: Kristen, I... don't go to your trailer! [notices her coffee cup is empty] Can I get you another cup of coffee?
KK: [Smiles and sits back down] Sure.
TW: [Runs around preparing coffee for KK] Cream and sugar?
KK: You don't know by now? We've been working together for seven years! [TW tries to steal a glace at her old cup but KK covers it with her hand and give him a coy smile] I'm waiting.
TW: I.. uh.. [banging his head against the cabinet] think think think. Oh, what the hell. [Dumps some cream and sugar in the coffee and brings it to KK]
KK: Thank you, Tom.
TW: [Smiles]
KK: But I take it black.
TW: Dammit [Moves to take back the cup]
KK: It's too late, Tom. Why don't you just leave?
TW: Kristen, I'm sorry...
KK: Just leave.
TW: [exiting] Dammit!
[KK smiles and takes a sip of the coffee and puts her laptop back on the table]
MR: [voice muffled] You don't drink your coffee black.
KK: I know. I just enjoy torturing him.
MR: Can I come out now?
KK: Hold on. [Looks around, gets up and looks down the hall] Yes.
MR: [crawling out from under a cabinet] Not that I'm not grateful but why did you choose me to write this one with you again?
KK: All the others... they're just so annoying right now.
MR: Heh. I'm not annoying!
KK: Yes you are.
MR: But...
KK: You're just not as annoying.
MR: Kristen, that's not nice!
KK: I think I hear Tom coming back.
MR: [Dives back under the cabinet.]
KK: [Smiles to herself and starts typing] Plus you're easy to get rid of if we have a disagreement about the script.
MR: Hey!
[KK types for a few more seconds]
MR: Is Tom coming or not?!?!
KK: I don't know.
MR: [Peeking out.] Kristen!
KK: I don't hear anything now.
[MR crawls halfway back out]
MR: Why can't we do this in the safety of your trailer?
KK: It's more fun to do it here.
MR: Not for me!
KK: Wait.
MR: What?
KK: Did you hear that?
MR: Hear what?
KK: Footsteps?
[MR scrambles back in hitting his head on the way]
MR: Ow!
KK: [laughs]
MR: That wasn't funny!
KK: Oh.. Hee.. Yes.. Heehee.. It.. Ha. was! In fact if it was like the show you'd be unconscious now!
MR: I hate you.
KK: [Typing] In fact I have the perfect scene for it!
MR: I really hate you!
KK: [Looks past MR's field of vision] Oh, hey, Tom.
[MR pulls his head back in hitting his head again]
MR: Ow!
KK: [Falls off her chair laughing]
MR: Tom's not really there is he?
KK: [continues laughing]
MR: Is he?
KK: [continues laughing]
MR: I really, really hate you.

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