Golden Years

[AoT sits in her makeup chair. Her makeup artist is just finishing up. Cue Bowie's "Golden Years". In strut BS and MR]
BS: [Dusting AoT's face with powder] Golden years, gold whop whop whop
MR: [Applying mascara to his own eye lashes] Golden years, gold whop whop whop
BS: [Hands MR some lipstick. MR puts it on] Golden years, gold whop whop whop

BS: Don't let me hear you say life's taking you nowhere, [hands MR a Bowie wig]
MR: Angel!
BS: [Pushing AoT's makeup artist out and donning an apron. AoT moves to get out of the chair but BS firmly pushes her back down] Don't get up my baby.
MR: [Sporting lipstick, mascara, and the Bowie wig] Just look me, the day's begun!
BS: [Applying blush to AoT's face] The lighting is harsh but the cast still looks too young.
MR: [AoT struggles to get up out of the chair. MR tilts it all the way back] Don't get up my baby!
[ED pokes her head into the room]
ED: Where's my baby?
MR: Lost, that's all
ED: Lost? I'm begging you -- save his little soul! [ED runs off in panic]
BS: Golden years, gold
MR: whop whop whop
BS: [AoT continues to struggle] Don't get up my baby.

[TW walks in proud as a peacock to be wearing the suit]
TW: Last night they loved me! Opening doors and pulling some strings
BS: [Hugging TW] Angel!
MR: [Strapping AoT down] Don't get up my baby.
BS: And what luck, you look so fine!
[TW takes a bow]
BS: Never look back, walk tall, and fly!
[TW takes a flying leap out of the room]
MR: Don't get up my baby.

BS: [Applying more makeup to AoT] I'll make sure you look a hundred years.
[JG shows up and looks at AoT with concern]
JG: No lover's gonna touch you in your golden years,
MR: [Brushing AoT's hair] gold
BS: Golden years, gold
MR: whop whop whop
[AoT struggles mightily to get out of the chair but it's in vain]
BS: Don't get up my baby.

BS: One of these days,
MR: And it wont be long.
BS: Gonna make sure you look like you once belonged.
[TW falls in through the ceiling.]
TW: Just look at my cape, It's twenty foot long!
BS: [Seeing AoT continues to struggle] Don't cry my sweet, don't break my heart.
TW: Did what's right, I finally got smart
BS: [Singing TW's praises] Wish upon, wish upon, day upon day, I believed oh lord! I believed you'd wear the suit one day!
MR: Don't get up my baby
[TW, BS, and MR look at AoT's face]
TW: She needs more eye shadow!
MR: She needs more eye shadow!
BS: [Applying eye shadow to AoT] She needs more eye shadow in her golden years!

ED: [Rushes in holding up a baby in a miniature super-suit] Found my baby! He was lost, that's all!
ED: [Holding the baby in from of AoT] Why don't you say hi to your Grandma-ma?
BS: Golden years, gold
MR: whop whop whop
ED: Come on, hold my baby!

BS: [To ED] Don't let me hear you say life's taking you nowhere!
ED: [Smiles and hugs the baby tight]
TW: [Smiling and rubbing the baby's head] Angel
ED & TW: [To AoT] Come on, hold our baby
ED: She needs more eye shadow!
TW: She needs more eye shadow!
MR: She needs more eye shadow!
BS: [Applying eye shadow] In her golden years

BS: [Applying even more makeup] I'll make sure you look a hundred years!
JG: No lover's gonna touch you in your golden years.
[They start spinning AoT's chair around and around]
BS: Golden years, gold
MR: whop whop whop
TW: Golden years, gold
ED: whop whop whop
BS: Golden years, gold
MR: whop whop whop
TW: Golden years, gold
ED: whop whop whop
[Suddenly they stop the chair and MR places a grey Bowie style wig on AoT's head. She looks at herself in the mirror. She's made up to look like a hundred year old Ziggy Stardust]
AoT: AAAAAAAAAAAAAhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[MR's trailer. He's fallen asleep playing Guitair Hero on his Wii. It's gone into demo mode playing Bowie tunes]
AoT: [From a couple trailers away] AAAAAAAAAAAAAhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
MR: [jolting awake and instinctively cowering] It wasn't my fault! I swear!
[MR looks around, gets up and checks that is door is locked and lies back down on the couch. In a couple seconds he's snoring again.]
MR: Zzzzzz.
[Suddenly with a huge bang his door flies into the room. A pissed AoT stands in the door way.]
MR: [Groggy] Annette?
[AoT calmly walks toward him]
MR: No, no, no, no, no!

[Cut to outside MR's trailer. MR flies out his door and lands in a heap between his and JG's trailer. JG sits at his open window.]
JG: Heh. You know, Rosenbaum, I don't think I've ever enjoyed being your neighbor more than I have the past few days.
[AoT shows up in MR's doorway]
AoT: I'm going to snap you like a twig, Rosenbaum!
JG: [Chuckles] Run, boy, run!
[MR struggles to get back up and stumbles off]
JG: So, Annette, are you going to give him a head start?
AoT: [Glaring at JG] I'm tempted not to.
JG: Why are you looking at me like that?
AoT: [Ashamed] Never mind. Rosenbaum is the one who needs to pay! [Starts walking off.]
JG: Come on, Annette! The the poor boy deserves a sporting chance!
AoT: OK, fine. How much time should I give him?
JG: [Standing] One cup of tea?
AoT: Sounds good.
[JG opens his door and AoT walks in]
JG: I have a kettle on.
AoT: One cup of tea... and a biscuit. You have biscuits, don't you?
JG: My aren't you in a sporting mood tonight, Mrs. O'Toole. And as a matter of fact I do. [pause] Shall I invite Tom and Erica over too?
AoT: No, no. It's probably a good idea for me not to see them right now.
JG: [Pulling a box of biscuits out of his cabinet] That must have been some nightmare.
AoT: Trust me. You don't want to know. [Pause] You had any?
JG: [Serving biscuits] To tell the truth, I've had a few.
AoT: But you haven't taken it out on Michael?
JG: In the dreams I always manage to kill either him or Bryan before I waking up. Sometimes both.
AoT: I don't know I'd call that a nightmare.
JG: I suppose you're right. [Takes the whistling tea pot off the stove and pours two cups] In it's own way it's quite satisfying, actually.

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