7.09 Collusion by TW and ED (Part V)

as retold by Bill C

TW: Okay, so Chloe is standing in the office doorway. Allison, would you?
AM [dejectedly]: Sure. Why not? "Lois...I need to talk to you."
ED: Lois looks up from her desk, appropriately surprised. "Chloe! I was just thinking about you! Just hang on a minute." She yells out the door for some geeky-looking guy carrying a laptop who's going by behind Chloe to come fix her computer.
AM: So Chloe is moved aside by the guy, and she and Lois end up off to one side while he works on Lois's computer. "Okay...Lois? I need your help with something."
ED: "Anything, cuz'. What's up?"
AM: Chloe lowers her voice a bit. "I need to hijack one of the Planet's computers for a minute."
TW: The support guy replies without looking up from his work. "What, to look up the cure for cancer or something?"
AM, AoT, and MR: ...well, she could.
[AM, AoT, and MR all look at each other in surprise]
JG: We've been living together way too long.
ED: Lois whacks the guy on the back. "Less talk, more fix!" She then takes Chloe's arm and pulls her a few feet away, then whispers to her. "Okay, seriously--why do you need to use a computer here?"
AM: Chloe whispers back. "To hack LuthorCorp."
ED: "Huh? Why do you want to get into their system?"
AM: Chloe's already moving towards Bittleman's desk as Lois asks her that, and she plops down in his chair and starts typing on his computer. A girl on a mission, huh? Okay. "I need to access their surveillance system."
TW: Sex pops up in the next shot, right behind Chloe. "Don't do this, Chloe. Trust me on this."
ED: Lois follows Chloe over to that desk, conveniently to one side of Sex, still keeping her voice down. "Okay, hang on. Why do you need to get into that system?"
AM: "I need to see the recordings from Lex's office for the day Lana was killed."
ED: "You what?"
TW: "You really shouldn't do this."
ED: "Okay, why the hell do you want to see those?"
AM: "Isn't it strange that nothing was revealed about how Lana died? Just that it was an accident of some sort?"
ED: "Well, this is LuthorCorp. The 'accident' company."
MR: Ouch.
AM: Chloe's still furiously typing. Bittleman's computer screen briefly displays the LuthorCorp logo, then miscellaneous text and such. "I think they're hiding what really happened to Lana. I need to know."
TW: "No, you don't. It was...it could only have been an accident."
AM: Chloe says through her teeth, "I'm not talking to you."
ED: "Excuse me?"
AM: "What? Oh...oh, sorry, Lois. I'm...just not myself these days."
MR: Isn't that the truth.
TW: We get a warning buzz from Bittleman's computer, and the screen displays some text about a server being removed from the LuthorCorp network for maintenance. Chloe pounds a fist on the desk and goes...
AM: "Dammit!"
ED: Lois thinks for a minute.
JG: Or ten.
ED: Shut up. "Okay, so that means the server containing the recording isn't available remotely. What about locally?"
AM: "What?"
ED: "Just thinking...it's a good bet that, if the server was taken off their network, it's still in place at LuthorCorp so people can work on it. Assuming they do it like Jeremy and the other geeks--"
TW: Support Guy goes, "Hey!"
ED: "--do it here. You would just have to access it the old-fashioned way...in person."
AM: Chloe looks thoughtful. "So I'd have to get into LuthorCorp and find their server room."
ED: "Come to think of it...hang on." Lois goes back to her desk and retrieves her purse, riffling through it for something. After a few seconds she pulls out a standard ID keycard with the LuthorCorp insignia on it. "I forgot I still had this..."
AM: Chloe looks over at Lois, and sees the card. "Where'd you get that?"
ED: "Uh...borrowed it from a friend."
AM: "You've been there before?" Chloe starts doing the hand thing. "God, Lois...no. This is my problem. I'll do this myself."
ED: "The hell you will, cuz'. If there is a cover-up--why would they want to cover something like that up, though? An experiment got loose?"
AM: Chloe frowns. "I shouldn't have come here...shouldn't have gotten you involved. I'll work this out--"
ED: "With a little help from family, Chloe, and there isn't a damn thing you can do about it. Besides, I'm stuck waiting on Jeremy to fix my--"
TW: At that exact moment, Lois's computer suddenly sparks.
AoT [laughs]: Oh, God, Tom!
MR: You're kidding, right? The old sparking computer gag?
TW: I couldn't think of anything better, okay? The support geek, er, Jeremy goes flying back against Chloe, who instinctively grabs him by the arms for a moment and then lets him go.
JG: He'd make a great rebound screw for her.
AM: If we ever do a mirror-universe episode, I'll be sure to write that in.
MR: Ouch.
TW: Jeremy looks at Lois's computer, which is putting out a little plume of smoke by this point, and mutters something about restoring from backups and getting a replacement out of storage on his way out the door.
ED: Lois looks pissed. "Dammit...well, there goes at least the next couple of hours." She looks at Chloe. "What do you want to do for lunch?"
AM: Chloe sighs. "LuthorCorp?"
ED: Lois nods in return. "LuthorCorp."

Continued...