7.03 United by MR and AoT (Part V)

As retold by RepairmanBob

MR: Chloe walks into the fight scene with LittleLex and LittleOllie from Reunion.
AM: At the rate this is going, I wouldn’t be surprised if LittleLex gets gang-raped in the bathroom by LittleOllie and his buddies.
JG: (starts taking notes) Maybe I can add that to -
MR: Try it and I will have a Lionel join a sewing circle full of adorable grandmas in 7.05.
JG: You wouldn’t dare.
MR: He will be knitting mittens for those orphans he reads to in his free time.
JG: (Throws away notes).
MR: Chloe comes on the scene where Lex is attacking his friend. Pull back to see Lex is punching himself in the face.
TW: Lex is a fucking mess.

KK: Back to reality. Clark tries to fight Steven again, and is still getting his ass kicked.
TW: Does Clark get to look good in this episode?
MR: He was concerned about Chloe, and is protecting people by fighting an enemy he can't seem to hurt. Seems pretty heroic to me.
TW: Well, when you put it that way…
JG: Don’t let yourself get manipulated that easily, Tom!
MR: Of course, you do have your veto.
TW: I’ll hold onto that for now.
KK: Steven screams and punches Clark through a building. We get a close up of Steven, and see he is screaming in pain.

MR: Chloe walks into yet another scene. Lex is standing still, being yelled at by Clark and Lana. Clark has the dialogue from Bound, or some other speech where he says horrible, heartless thing to Lex.
TW: I hate that speech.
MR: Lana is repeating her final speech to Lex from Promise. Lex is just standing still, looking off into nowhere.
AM: Just like everyone else when does Lana talks.
KK: Chloe looks at them, and gets pissed off. “Damnit, Lex! Where the hell are you?”
MR: Clark and Lana disappear, and Lex turns, looks at her and smiles. “Hello, Chloe.”

KK: Hope in the hospital. She opens a laptop puts on a Bluetooth headset and checks in with the retrieval team.
JG: Bluetooth? Must we pimp products?
MR: Only if we want to get paid.
TW: Pimpin’ ain’t easy.
AM: Remember when Pete did all the pimping?
TW: Good times.
KK: Mercy sees that someone is accessing the Level 33.1 database and taking the information.

MR: Lex looks at Chloe and says gratefully “I never thought I would say this again, but I am overjoyed to see you Chloe.”
AM: Again?
MR: “My father told me how your power works, and I know how dangerous this was. Thank -"
KK: “This isn’t about you, Lex. Your latest Frankenstein is tearing up Metropolis. I am only helping you because Hope said you could shut him down.”
MR: Lex’s face drops, and the gratitude is gone. “I should have known. My mother abandoned me. My father repeatedly betrayed and attacked me. Clark curses my name every chance he gets. My dear Lana hated me on the very day we married. Why should you be any different?”
JG: Damn, Lex really is a little bitch.
KK: “Get over yourself, Lex. Remember what you did to my mother? Or when your pet scientists strapped me to your tables? I have hated you for years.”
MR: “Oh, how quickly you forget the past.”
TW: Smallville – just forget the past.
MR: Lex waves his hand, and a grainy picture appears. Lex and Chloe are standing together. Chloe is wearing a red dress -
AM: (mouth drops look of horror on her face) You wouldn’t. You couldn’t.
MR: And Lex is wearing a white suit.
AM: (looks even more horrified) Nonononononononono.
MR: How about that? Chole says the same thing!
TW: Michael, are you sure about this?
AM: They said they got rid of all the copies of this! How did you –
KK: I like this episode again. Chloe looks horrified.
TW: I think Allison has that down.

MR: Martha and Lionel still watching Steven tear stuff up.
JG: And tossing Clark around like a bitch.
AM: I don’t believe it.
KK: Come on, Clark gets his ass kicked all the time.
TW: He really does.
AM: No, I mean –
KK: We all know. Stay on topic, Allison. Martha: ” There must be something we can do, Lionel.”
JG: Take me now!
MR: Maybe when you write it. “These are being beings with meta-human powers, Martha. Without Clark, what can regular people do against them?”
KK: Martha looks like she has an idea. She calls her CoS, and asks for the name of the mutant rights advocate.

MR: Back to Chlex TV!
AM: I want to use my veto now. I want this whole scene gone.
MR: Are you sure, Allison? You don’t want to wait and see what else is coming up?
KK: I know I do.
JG: He has a point, Allison. I wish he hadn’t tricked me.
AM: Fine.
MR: Whatever. Chloe and Lex watch the scene, with Lex narrating. “Do you remember, Chloe? I saved you from my father, and kept you safe for an entire summer when the world thought you were dead. Clark disappeared, Lana ran off to France and Lois was wandering around with her father. I saved your life. I was there for you.”
AM: (puts head down)
MR: DreamChloe moves in to kiss DreamLex. “Then you confused my simple kindness for something more.” DreamLex moves back and laughs. “I tried to make it clear you had confused my friendship and developed some kind of schoolgirl crush.” DreamChloe looks crushed, but covers it up quickly with a sad smile. The image fades. “And ever since, you have hated me.
KK: Chloe looks visibly shaken. (Glances at AM) Which you also have down. “You are insane, Lex.”
MR: “To be honest, I am not surprised you ended up with Jimmy. After Clark rejected you for so many years and I made it clear I was not interested, I should have guessed you would have spread your legs for the first boy to show you the slightest bit of attention–
KK: (stand up, does a dance)
AM: (Stands up, slaps MR) Go the hell!
JG: (Gets his popcorn back out!) Yes! Do it again! Do it again!
KK: Hey, Chloe does that too! (Smirk) Allison, are you sure you didn’t already see the script?
AM: (face flushed, looks enraged). Take. It. Out.
TW: Allison, he is just baiting you. What if –
AM: Take it out, or so help me Lex and Clark will move to Massachusetts and get married! I will bring back Ollie to star in the show! I will have Lionel join the Red Cross!
JG: Hey!
AM: I will clone Lana so she appears in every single episode this season!
KK: You wouldn’t dare!
AM: I will bring in Supergirl! I will get writers from Charmed and One Three Hill! I will drug the food, bring back those Star Trek morons, and shut down production! So help me, I will fuck up this show beyond anything you can imagine if you do not get rid of that line!
MR: (sly grin) Done. “I realize you've always been desperate for any sign of affection, Chloe. Still the fact you latched on to the first the first little freckled shutterbug to even look your way is surprising even to me."
TW: (Looks at AM) Sucker.

Continued...